Recipes Dream: Pineapple Salmon Slow Cooker Recipe (flop!)

When Adam and I were in our first year of marriage we lived in an apartment about a half-mile away from his brother and family. We were lucky enough to be invited over for dinner pretty often, and always happily accepted.

Adam's sister-in-law, Angela, is an excellent cook. Her family owns restaurants, and she's grown up in the kitchen and around food. I've always been quite impressed with the way she can open a fridge and just start throwing things together to make a really fantastic meal--- no recipe required.

She made us a salmon dinner one night (gosh, a good 12 years ago) that I still think about. It was the best salmon I have ever eaten. Ever.

ever.

She says she doesn't remember what she marinated the salmon in, but I knew pineapple juice was involved. and soy sauce.

I think.

I've been trying, unsuccessfully, to recreate this salmon. Last week I tried again.

It did not go so well.

The Ingredients.

(do NOT make this!)

4 salmon fillets

1 fresh pineapple, skinned and cubed

1 large orange, juiced

2 tablespoons balsamic vinegar

1/3 cup soy sauce (La Choy and Tamari wheat-free are gluten free)

2 cloves garlic, smashed

1 teaspoon red chile flakes

aluminum foil

an outdoor garbage can

The Directions.

Use a 6-quart slow cooker (but not really. don't attempt to make this. please.) In a blender combine the pineapple, orange juice, balsamic vinegar, soy sauce, garlic, and chile flakes. Blend until you have a creamy sauce (the color will not be pretty. that should have set off some bells and whistles for me...)

Place the salmon fillets into a flat baking dish with high sides (a pyrex or corningware with a lid works best). Pour the sauce blend evenly over the top. Refrigerate your fish in the sauce for two hours or so (or don't. this tastes really bad and you shouldn't be doing any of this anyhow.)

After the time has elapsed, spread a length of foil out on your kitchen countertop. Place the fish inside (lots of the sauce will stay in the dish. this is fine. trust me, you don't want the sauce.) and crimp the sides of the foil to make a fully enclosed packet. You can stagger-stack all the fish fillets to make one large packet with all of the fish, or you can wrap each fillet individually.

Your choice.

Put the packet(s) into your crockpot and cook on high for 2 hours, or until the fish flakes easily with a fork.

Taste.

Then take outside and throw away.

The Verdict.

The "finished" picture up top is taken on the brick outside by the garbage bins. Thankfully I made this the night before the garbage was picked up---

I've made fish in the crockpot dozens and dozens and dozens of times, and have NEVER had this happen. The fish smelled really really fishy (I think it was a weird chemical break-down with the vinegar?) and the sauce tasted just how it looked.

really, really bad.

We had baked potatoes for dinner instead.

still want fish? these are the good ones!

Salmon with Lime Butter

Sweet and Spicy Salmon

My Totally Together: Shortcuts to an Organized Life book/planner hits bookstores today. You should get it! :-)

have a great day! have any flops? feel free to share!