I've had a bit of a difficult stretch over the past two weeks, marked by intensity in all feelings and events. Things have been both really good and really tough to bear - marked by love, loss, death, and the general anxiety that usual accompanies all of these. Things in my life are changing, and that's not an entirely bad thing.
But it's left me with a lot of strange energy. I either spend a lot of time at my computer, looking at the same things again and again, or take my energy out onto Hampstead Heath, running as hard as I can for as long as I can. I've spent a lot of time sitting in my front window, staring into space. It must seem crazy to other people. And as a result of all this, I haven't really been eating very well - skipping meals, overeating when I'm not hungry, eating sandwiches as I run to do the next thing on my list. I haven't been cooking. And I haven't really wanted to.
Which is crazy, right? I love to cook. It's where I always used to take all of my emotions - I'd turn on some Emmy the Great, sing really loudly, and bake a cake. I'd chop vegetables really quickly until my hands went numb. I'd calm myself by melting butter. So I figured, if I can't get rid of this intensity - and if I really have to go through it - then I'd damn well like to eat something that can match it.
This pasta is really quick - but it's got a bit too much going on. But in a good way. It's spicy, sour, salty, and really fresh tasting. Capers, garlic and green chili form an intense heat, while sour lemons and salty parmesan add bite. I could eat bowls of it, again and again. And at this rate, I might end up doing that.
*****
Penne with Spinach, Lemon, and Chilies
Enough for two.
200 grams brown rice penne, or whatever kind you like
1 clove garlic, minced
1 tbsp. capers, roughly chopped
1 large green chili, minced
three big handfuls baby spinach, torn
1/2 lemon
parmesan
salt and pepper
olive oil
1. Bring your water to a boil and toss in your pasta. 2. Meanwhile, gently fry your garlic, capers, and chili in a bit of olive oil. Once they are fragrant and just softened, toss in your spinach and season with loads of pepper and a bit of salt. 3. Continue to cook your spinach down until it's wilted, about two minutes, and then either take a few spoonfuls of it and blend in a blender or, if you're like me, find a way to blitz some of it directly in the pan using an immersion blender. Season to taste. 4. Drain your pasta, reserving a spoonful of your pasta water, and toss into the spinach. Toss well, remove from heat, and squeeze with lemon. Check the seasoning and serve covered with lots of parmesan and more pepper.
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